I’ve been carrying a confession for some time now, one that’s been weighing heavy on my heart and is often concealed behind the façade of perfect motherhood. It’s something that many mothers would nod their heads in agreement to, a shared experience that remains unspoken.
As the mother of an 8-year-old, I’ve questioned my decision to become a mom more times than I care to admit. There have been moments when I yearned to return to a simpler time, when coffee was just a delicious indulgence, and not a life raft, keeping me afloat amidst the endless waves of responsibilities and demands of motherhood.
Countless times, I have found myself torn between the love and joy I feel as a mother and the overwhelming weight of the challenges that come with it. In those moments, a fierce inner battle ensues. How could I ever entertain the idea of regretting motherhood, when it has brought me the greatest joy and love I have ever known?
The very thought feels like a betrayal. Doubts have spiraled, and before I knew it, I have been drowning in a sea of guilt and self-doubt. The weight of it all has been suffocating, making me feel like a terrible, ungrateful mother – a label that I know deep down is far from the truth.
The day that I will never forget
I vividly remember the emotions I experienced when my little girl was just a toddler of two. Even after all these years, the memories are as clear to me as if they happened yesterday.
That particular day, as I tried to put my daughter to sleep, I felt like I had just completed a triathlon. My body was drained of all energy, my mind was foggy, and my eyelids felt heavy. I had been up since the first flush of the morning, and I could feel my body giving up. As I rocked my daughter back and forth, trying to soothe her, a sense of despair suddenly washed over me.
The room was quiet, but inside my head, it was a different story. My thoughts were racing, and they were all dark. I couldn’t help but wonder why I had decided to become a mother.
The thought of being bound to motherhood indefinitely sent shivers down my spine and left me feeling suffocated. It was like being trapped in a small, dark room with no windows or doors.
In that moment, I longed for the carefree days of my past life, before the responsibilities of motherhood took hold. Did I feel guilty? Yes. After all, I loved my daughter more than anything in the world.
But I just couldn’t help it.
A Glimpse of Clarity
As I sat there with my thoughts, I suddenly caught a glimpse of a subtle movement from the corner of my eye. It was my baby’s little hand reaching out to grasp my finger.
At that moment, something shifted inside me. Something stirred deep within me, altering my perspective. It was like she knew exactly what I was thinking and was offering me solace in the only way she knew how.
I felt a rush of love and gratitude. Her gentle touch sent a jolt of warmth and comfort that coursed through my veins, soothing every fiber of my being. An overwhelming sense of peace overpowered me.
I remembered how much I had wanted to be a mother, and how lucky I was to have this little life in my arms. I remembered how I felt when I held my daughter in my arms for the first time, how everything else in the world paled in comparison to her first steps and first smiles.
It made me wonder. When I know deep down how much I love my daughter, why am I experiencing these doubts and dark thoughts? This behaviour of mine seemed so out of character.
A New Dawn
Overwhelmed by love, I pulled my little one in close, unwilling to let go.
As I held my precious little miracle, a surge of understanding rushed through me: if I wanted to be the best mom I could be, I needed to prioritise taking care of myself. It dawned on me that taking care of myself as a mother isn’t a mere luxury, but a crucial component of preserving the joy of motherhood and stopping the malicious doubts and fears that threaten to overshadow it.
It was as if all the puzzle pieces fell into place and suddenly, everything made perfect sense. I realized that I had been neglecting myself for far too long. I had been so focused on taking care of my baby that I had forgotten about my own needs.
I finally saw the bigger picture that being a mom is not just about the sacrifices and challenges, but also about the purest joys and rewards that motherhood has to offer. However, it’s only possible if we as moms prioritize our well-being.
In that instant, I decided that I couldn’t keep living the same way, something needed to shift. It was time for me to act and make a change, so I did just that.
Time for some real talk
Motherhood is intense.
It sets off a tug-of-war within oneself. You might feel torn between the joy of nurturing a little life and the pangs of guilt for the days gone by.
It’s about finding that delicate balance between your responsibilities and your own needs and making sure that you don’t neglect the latter. Prioritising self-care is the secret ingredient to achieving that balance.
But Wait…There’s More.
Self-care is just one piece of the puzzle – moms need to prioritize their healthcare too.
It’s worth remembering that you are the backbone of your family, and your well-being is just as important as anyone else’s. When you feel healthy and happy, you can tackle anything that comes your way with ease. You are better equipped to handle the demands of motherhood and can give your family the love and attention they deserve.
Let’s not forget that after all, a healthy mom is a better mom, and a happy mom? Well, that’s just a bonus.
Self-care starts with healthcare. Here are some tips that can help you prioritize your health as a mom.
- Start small: Don’t overwhelm yourself with grand self-care plans. Instead, start small with something simple like taking five minutes in the morning to stretch, meditate, or sip on some coffee while enjoying a good read.
- Get moving for a happier and healthier you: A brief yoga session or a brisk walk can work wonders for your overall well-being.
- Keep your health in check: Schedule regular check-ups and tests to monitor your health and to catch any potential issues before they become a real problem.
- Want to feel your best? Eat the best: Opt for whole grains, veggies, and fruits to fuel up. Indulge in a well-balanced diet.
- Just say “no”: It’s a complete sentence, and it feels so good to use it for something that doesn’t align with your priorities.
- You don’t have to be a supermom and do it all alone: Ask for help when you need it, whether it’s hiring a babysitter or getting your partner to tackle some household chores.
- Make sleep your BFF: Don’t let the daily hustle keep you from a good night’s sleep, it’s the key to being your best self.
- You deserve to feel your best: Prioritize your health and well-being by opting for comprehensive healthcare products that are designed specifically for you. Invest in them.
Dear exhausted mama, it’s time to rediscover who you are and nurture the parts of yourself that may have been buried under the weight of motherhood.
Always remember: You are much more than just a mom!
About Author : Aaina Chopra is a writer, personal branding strategist, and a hands-on mom to an 8-year-old.